I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
