It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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