I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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