well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
