dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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