we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
