Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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