I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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