Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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