There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
