I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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