3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i don't like sucking hair
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Randomize
