I love black thongs
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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