why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
