Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize