school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
