I am puke
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
