I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
