would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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