Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
