Sponge bath it is.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
