we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
