Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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