Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
