I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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