Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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