In America we eat man semen.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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