On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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