If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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