Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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