Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.

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(310): View more from California

Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho

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(847): View more from Illinois

You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

My vagina just recognized that song.

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(269): View more from Michigan

Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"

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(519): View more from Ontario

You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned

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(813): View more from Florida

The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.

(1-813): View more from Florida

What? How can you say that? You won!

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(+61): View more from Australia

I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country

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