doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
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