OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
