There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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