Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him āfuck meā eyes during a lecture a few times.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize