She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
