Do you still have your period?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Oh god it's open bar.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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