yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
