Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
