What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
