That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
