I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
