You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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