I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
