I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize