May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
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