i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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