Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
