I wannas sexs uuuuu
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize