and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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