she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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