What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize